{"id":863,"date":"2017-07-13T14:18:56","date_gmt":"2017-07-13T14:18:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/?p=863"},"modified":"2017-07-13T14:18:56","modified_gmt":"2017-07-13T14:18:56","slug":"genealogical-kindness-needed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/?p=863","title":{"rendered":"Genealogical Kindness Needed"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/mean.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"225\" height=\"225\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-864\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/mean.jpg 225w, https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/mean-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 225px) 85vw, 225px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Seriously, folks, I&#8217;ve had my fill this week of dealing with difficult people.  IMHO, life&#8217;s too short for bad manners.  <\/p>\n<p>I have a very large online public tree on several sites.  The reason it&#8217;s large is because I&#8217;ve done surname studies over the last 20+ years for several lines with unique names &#8211; Duer, Harbaugh and Leininger.  Taking the last family history book published, that would be 1947 for the Harbaughs and 1973 for the Leiningers, I&#8217;ve add all the info into the tree from those sources and then tried to prove the info was correct by adding additional citations.  I then tried to update the original works going forward so that family could reconnect.  The Duer information was unpublished; I received it from a family historian about 2010.<\/p>\n<p>The gateway ancestor&#8217;s for all of these lines died in the 19th century or earlier so some of those included in the tree are far removed from my direct line.  I don&#8217;t personally know these people.  I made the tree public to help reconnect and aid in correcting any errors.  <\/p>\n<p>Three times this week I have heard from distant relatives and the comments\/emails were rude.  One woman told me my tree was confusing her.  I offered to help but needed to know what was confusing about it.  She said I had no pictures for a person she was interested in.  Huh?  I understand visual learning but really, you&#8217;re complaining because there was no picture.  <\/p>\n<p>Later that day, someone posted a comment that they were sure I was wrong about a gateway ancestor because they had their Y-DNA done.  I responded to please share and I&#8217;d be happy to look further.  No response.  I wouldn&#8217;t have been concerned if the individual had emailed me privately but to post a comment and then not respond when someone is willing to check further is wrong.<\/p>\n<p>That evening, I hit the trifecta when someone commented on another line that he was certain &#8220;you must have made this up.&#8221;  I was taken aback.  Did you not look at the citations?  Did you not see my comment that mentioned I concurred with other researchers that it was possible two brothers were confused so I included both names as the possible father?  <\/p>\n<p> The old adage we can choose our friends but not our relatives applies here!  That last comment ticked me off so much that I considered making my tree private.  I haven&#8217;t done so because I think the good outweighs the few thoughtless individuals.  <\/p>\n<p>Thanks, dear readers, for reading my rant.  Please help me spread genealogical kindness this week.  It&#8217;s sorely needed.<\/p>\n<p>I will be taking a much needed vacation so will not have a blog post until I return the end of July.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Seriously, folks, I&#8217;ve had my fill this week of dealing with difficult people. IMHO, life&#8217;s too short for bad manners. I have a very large online public tree on several sites. The reason it&#8217;s large is because I&#8217;ve done surname studies over the last 20+ years for several lines with unique names &#8211; Duer, Harbaugh &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/?p=863\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Genealogical Kindness Needed&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[82,195,505,80],"class_list":["post-863","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-trends-and-musings","tag-duer","tag-harbaugh","tag-kindness","tag-leininger"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/863","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=863"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/863\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":876,"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/863\/revisions\/876"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=863"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=863"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.genealogyatheart.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=863"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}